How To Be “Bad” At Something Without Spiraling

Being “bad” at something is subjective. 

What was a terrible game for one person might be the best another person has ever played. What seems like a good effort to you now might look like a disaster in your own eyes years later. 

To be bad at something isn’t to be stuck in perpetual mediocrity, it is just to be in the process of getting it right.

But oftentimes, when we label ourselves as “bad” at something, we trade in a little bit of our optimism and hope of becoming better, for a fixed mindset that is not only more resistant to change, but more prone to giving up on progress entirely and also a complete bummer. Allowing yourself to spiral into this mindset will make it even harder to continue working toward improvement and eventual success. 

When you constantly tell yourself you’re never going to do well on a test, succeed in your job, or get better at a skill, you are only growing your chances at falling victim to a “self-fullfilling prophecy.” 

This psychological theory explains that the more we believe something about ourselves, the more we will inadvertently turn the tide toward what we already think is true. 

To combat your fixed mindset and keep a positive attitude when working toward improvements and goals, you’ll need to understand three main areas of thought:

1) You Are Still Growing

No skill is completely mastered, no subject is entirely learned. There is always room to grow and always opportunity to improve. 

When you’re at the beginning of the learning process though, this can be hard to realize. We tend to care more about eventually reaching the “finish line” or mastering the skill we’ve been practicing than we care about the little improvements that take place day-by-day. 

Any amount of growth, no matter at what level, is something to be proud of.

So no, you’re not “bad” at it, you’re on your way to becoming decent at it.

2) Comparison is the Thief of Joy (and of Progress)

We are all at different points in our learning of different skills. Comparing ourselves and our skill levels to others isn’t usually doing anything to help us improve and usually only creates frustration and sometimes resentment toward those that are doing better than us.

Comparison isn’t only the thief of joy, it's the spawn point for that little voice in your head that tells you to give up your dream of becoming a professional butterfly catcher because you will never be as good at capturing swallowtails as your five year old nephew, Timmy. 

We see those that are excelling in the same places we are struggling in and we let it weigh on our minds, making our successes seem smaller and our efforts look dismal. 

Allow yourself to be proud of the progress you’ve already made rather than focussing on what others have done, and you’ll find yourself enjoying the journey much easier.

3) Learning is Actually Fun

What if you were naturally good at everything? You could easily pick up any skill you’d like, become the captain of every sports team at school, have any job you wanted, and still have time to relax and enjoy life. 

Obviously, this isn’t the case for most of us. We can’t magically excel in everything we try and usually, we aren’t even averagely-good at something until we get some practice in. 

So if we are bound to struggle at first, why try anything new at all?

Even though we tend to associate the idea of “learning” with tests, stress, and classrooms full of other amateurs, the truth is that learning can actually be one of the most fun ways to spend your time.

The key is to genuinely enjoy what you’re trying to get better at. 

You won’t be able to get upset over slow progress when you are proud of every little step you take. 

You won’t care that Timmy now has a greenhouse filled with pretty butterflies because you’ll enjoy your time chasing after one yourself.

And most importantly, you won’t need to spiral over not being “good” at something because you’ll be in love with “getting better” instead.